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Tale of Online search…

June 23, 06 by Bharani

1. Post my profile in TeluguMatrimony.com [With a very short-and-sweet description, no photos uploaded, no horoscopes uploaded]

2. Explain the Online matrimonial facility to my parents and the benefits associated with it. Impressed with such a facility available in net, they pursue me to add more details. I even ended up paying Rs.1750/= to acquire the paid-benefits of the matrimonial site [Like sending personalized message, password-protecting the photograph etc.,]. Can’t believe it!

3. Go through the profiles matching my preferences. The most important filtering being “Search profiles who has put up photographs”!! Later, I realized that most of the people who put up photographs have published a well-crafted, studio-quality photographs. The bright-white teeth, the angel-like glow behind the hair and extremely fair face (a closer analysis will reveal the huge contrast between the hand color and the face color!) makes you wonder “How come everyone is so beautiful”??

4. Wait for someone to contact me. You know, the typical Why-should-I-make-the-first-move thought. Fed up with the dismal response rate, I begin to analyze the reasons…

5. Decide to search for profiles without photographs. I learn to patiently read the description written by the parents/friends/siblings. It turns out that genuinely interested people do not publish the photographs (or atleast password-protect the photographs).

6. Decide to make the first move. Express the interest to the newly found profiles and wait for response.

7. Decide to publish my photograph and put up my salary figure. Within 24 hours, the response rate improves dramatically. Agency problems??

8. All the while, I forgot about the Horoscope compatibility. I cannot seek the service of a Purohit each time to match the horoscopes nor can I learn the astrology overnight. Think…Think…Finally, I find an online Horoscope matching service which does a good job of matching.

9. Match the horoscopes of profiles to decide whether to proceed further or not. The service gives a score on a 36 scale. Minimum of 18 points is needed for horoscope to be compatible. If the points is 30+, then the match is excellent! But the score is not just enough..There are more checks like Manglik dosha, Nadi dosha, Masala dosha, Paper dosha etc.,!!! If there is any one dosha, then even if you have a score of 36 out of 36, the horoscopes are certified as incompatible! [A small fact, 46%-53% of people in the world are Mangliks]. Manglik dosha is the result of Mars positioning himself/herself in some specific squares in horoscope. Now is this what is meant when someone say “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus”…Juz Kidding ;)

10. It turns out that 5 out of 8 profiles that were up for matching are incompatible.

11. I get more responses [both response to my responses and fresh proposals]. The horoscope funneling eliminates the responses!

12. A close friend suggests to remove the salary figure and put the photograph (password-protected). Also, a few modifications in the description. I follow the same.

13. Two prospects have been contacting me since then. Also, they received a score of 33 out of 36 in horoscope compatibility test! One prospect asked me to meet the brother of the girl in hyderabad! Scared by the thought of being interviewed mercilessly by a stranger and by the speed at which events were taking place, I decided not to respond. I will let my parents do the initial talking.

14. One profile caught my attention, but for one thing. The HEIGHT! She was 170 cms. I remember my height as 169 cms. I wanted to confirm my height badly…I even bugged my flat mates to help me in measuring my height!! At that moment, I was complaining to god for being vertically challenged :) Anyway, I don’t want to end up as the shorter one after the marriage! So, with heavy heart had to let go that profile…and updated my preferences to reflect the height…

15. After few cycles, the preferences have evolved and many confusions are cleared. I have even come up with a bank of questions to ask whenever I get a chance to meet a prospect! There is also a document of “things that I would like to do for my life-partner” so that I can impress her in the future…you see, the problem of seeing too many Tam/Hindi love movies :)

16. Now comes the anti-climax. It turns out that my preferences have narrowed my choices way too much. Caste, Place, Education, Career, Height, Looks…etc.,

17. Totally confused and frustrated by the futility of the online search with such a preference, I finally decide to not log into matrimony site anymore. Atleast not for the next 1 month. As I was not lucky enough to find a life-partner on my own so far, I will leave the job to my parents…provided my preferences are satisfied. It’s going to be a long-drawn process…that’s for sure and it better take time, as it is a question of life…!

Only take-away: I got to meet/interact with 2-3 new people. It was great to know about their interests and ambitions in life.

For a brief period, there was a great interest to get married and settle in life fast..Now, the interest has died down (is gradually dying down..)…With the excitement and fun away, it’s time to kick-some-mighty-a** in work :) The momentum is finally picking up at work front…

PS: There was a big dilemma whether to publish this or not…Question of excitement vs consequence…finally, excitement prevailed…hope I am not wrong….

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